Hey Darlings,
How are you all today? I can't believe how much snow there is in Leeds. I've been camping out at my friends flat for almost a week now, since I've been living in fear that I'd get snowed in at my own home. Today I am actually going to attempt to get back, and it's not something I'm looking forward to. All of the busses have stopped running up to where I live (the problems with living in suburbia!) and taxi's really aren't keen on heading up that way, so wish me luck!
On another note, here is my pondersome issue of the day. Women. I have arrived at the conclusion that I find it exceptionally hard to get along with certain types of women, particularly in large groups. If I walk into a situation and the other person involved is relatively engaging, I'm good. I can cope with that and it puts me at ease. But on the other hand, if I walk into a situation and receive no response, or no eye contact, it literally makes me shut down. I feel like someone has hit me on the nose with a rolled up newspaper. (There's an image for you). The problem that then follows is that I find it incredibly hard to engage or relate to this person, which is always going to be an issue when it's someone you're supposed to at least get along with.
Now why just women you ask? Well, I genuinely have no idea. I get along really well with men, I find that I generally have a lot in common with them (maybe it's the car thing?), and they really do tend to judge a lot less. I'm also a bit too much of a free spirit for some people, sometimes I think they look at me and think really? You're actually going to do that?! You're actually interested in that?! I suppose I learnt a long time ago that if something happened and I ended up dead tomorrow, I wasn't going to lie there in my last minutes and think about everything that I wished I'd done. The last thing in the world that is important to me is money, or peoples opinions, or doing what I 'should'. This, I fear, is seen as somewhat of a bad attitude to some women, but it does mean for some reason that I tend to get on with men a little better.
I'm not by any means suggesting that every woman is like this. In fact I have come across very few in the past year or so. The community here is fantastic and I love how united and welcoming everyone is. It's most definitely not women as a whole I'm talking about... but rather that particular type of woman, or god forbid, the ones that move in a pack. I'm pretty sure we've all come across one or two in our lifetime.. Those ones who manage to make you feel about 3 inches tall in as many seconds.
I fear I may be about to go through this several times over, but I'm hoping not. There's always a chance right? Maybe I'm just way out of my comfort zone here, I haven't been in a situation with a lot of unknown heterosexual women in a long time. And now I sound like a hermit. Joy.
So considering all of this I am, as usual, wondering am I alone in this? I probably am aren't I? And, please let me know if you have any advice for me on how to deal with a situation like that? I feel that I'm failing somewhat!
Have a wonderful day everyone,
Lea
x
