A Lesbian Who Doesn't Like Gay Marriage?!

I'm so glad that my last post was received so well, your support and comments mean the world to me and I am so grateful for them. Just as I predicted, I lost followers, but I gained more than I lost, which was something I didn't expect. So hi to my newest followers, and thankyou for following me! It made my day! I also said that if I could help just 1 person then it would be worth it, and while I received quite a few emails, one in particular was worth it, even if I had ended up with 0 followers in the end <3

So the main question was about my beliefs on Gay Marriage, I think a lot of you were intrigued how someone who is gay could not support it. I think firstly I need to clarify that my wording was inaccurate; it's not that I don't support gay marriage in general, that was the wrong way for me to define it, it's that I don't support gay marriage personally.

Well that's confusing.

I know that doesn't make sense at first glance, but I'll try my best to explain it.

I understand that to a lot of gay people, being denied the right to Marry feels like a huge infringement on their human rights; who was Mr.Bigwig who legally defined marriage to say that it was just for a man and woman? Leviticus also says no haircuts, so why only listen to something that implies that marriage is not for same sex couples? The foundations that Marriage sit on are shaky at best and are under constant scrutiny. To some people, Marriage is incredibly important, for either personal or religious reasons, and for those people I understand why Gay Marriage is so important, and I support that fully.

However.

Religion is an area which I will discuss separately as that's a whole other issue, but in a nutshell, I don't believe that such an old text can be taken as concrete truth; it's outdated and non applicable to modern day life, if taken literally. (That is my own personal belief, I understand there are others who feel a different way and I respect your opinions). However, from the outset, it has been made pretty clear that marriage is for a man and a woman; it has never stated that it was for a man and a man or a woman and a woman. Likewise when laws were initially established, it was created as a union between a man and a woman; that was its function.

Well, I'm not with a man, I'm with a woman; therefore marriage is not for me. Civil Partnership was a pretty broken Olive Branch when it came to the promotion of equality between heterosexuals and homosexuals, but nonetheless, it's my Olive Branch.

Civil Partnership is a part of my identity, it is a symbol of my pride to be with a same sex partner. I am different, I am not 'normal' statistically, and I'm proud of that. It has taken me a long while to own it, but now that I do, I am comfortable with my label and I want others to know that. If a Marriage is defined as being for a man and a woman, then by my thinking, it isn't for me, because frankly, I don't fit into that category. Likewise, Civil Partnership is not for heterosexual couples, because they don't fit into that category. It's like letting men into the ladies loo; they just don't belong in there because they are inherently not part of that societal group.

My latter argument is slightly more controversial, so bear with me.

The LGBT population has been denied Marriage for such a long time, we have been persecuted and had our most basic human rights stripped many times throughout the course of history. It seems that Marriage is one of the final barriers, and we fight so hard for it.

The problem with that, is that the more we fight and the more that the authorities say no, the weaker we look, as they constantly maintain the power and the upper hand. From that exchange, the feelings of inequality are heightened, the feelings that we are less of a person than a heterosexual become increased. Why can they say no? Why won't they listen? Is it because I'm not good enough? And if that is not the case, then why do they have the power to deny us, and we have no power at all?

When you stop fighting for something, it shows that you don't care. It's like when you give up fighting to get your ex back, suddenly all the power they held has gone and they are left feeling deflated and powerless over you, as they no longer have that hold. You might not have your initial goal, but you have something different, but equal.

That is not to say that I believe that Civil Partnership is an equal to Marriage. As it stands there are some differences; they are few, but they do exist. The most poignant being the fact that there is no requirement for consummation (because they believe we cannot physically have a sexual relationship), and as a result, you cannot have a Civil Partnership severed as a result of adultery with another same sex person, as they do not recognise that it can happen.

To me, I would like to see the differences in Marriage and Civil Partnership cancelled out and a true equality placed across the board.

I would like to finish off by saying that my point of view on this is very controversial and people who are of my stance are few and far between. I know that Alex completely disagrees with me and wants to get married, but that is something we will have to find a compromise on.

I completely respect other peoples opinions on any subject, as there are too many in the world for only one to be right; some of you may strongly disagree with me, but that's okay.

I hope this has answered your questions <3

Lea

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