Tuesday, 22 January 2013

I think I may have a problem?


Hey Darlings, 

How are you all today? I can't believe how much snow there is in Leeds. I've been camping out at my friends flat for almost a week now, since I've been living in fear that I'd get snowed in at my own home. Today I am actually going to attempt to get back, and it's not something I'm looking forward to. All of the busses have stopped running up to where I live (the problems with living in suburbia!) and taxi's really aren't keen on heading up that way, so wish me luck! 

On another note, here is my pondersome issue of the day. Women. I have arrived at the conclusion that I find it exceptionally hard to get along with certain types of women, particularly in large groups. If I walk into a situation and the other person involved is relatively engaging, I'm good. I can cope with that and it puts me at ease. But on the other hand, if I walk into a situation and receive no response, or no eye contact, it literally makes me shut down. I feel like someone has hit me on the nose with a rolled up newspaper. (There's an image for you). The problem that then follows is that I find it incredibly hard to engage or relate to this person, which is always going to be an issue when it's someone you're supposed to at least get along with. 
Now why just women you ask? Well, I genuinely have no idea. I get along really well with men, I find that I generally have a lot in common with them (maybe it's the car thing?), and they really do tend to judge a lot less. I'm also a bit too much of a free spirit for some people, sometimes I think they look at me and think really? You're actually going to do that?! You're actually interested in that?! I suppose I learnt a long time ago that if something happened and I ended up dead tomorrow, I wasn't going to lie there in my last minutes and think about everything that I wished I'd done. The last thing in the world that is important to me is money, or peoples opinions, or doing what I 'should'. This, I fear, is seen as somewhat of a bad attitude to some women, but it does mean for some reason that I tend to get on with men a little better. 

I'm not by any means suggesting that every woman is like this. In fact I have come across very few in the past year or so. The community here is fantastic and I love how united and welcoming everyone is. It's most definitely not women as a whole I'm talking about... but rather that particular type of woman, or god forbid, the ones that move in a pack. I'm pretty sure we've all come across one or two in our lifetime.. Those ones who manage to make you feel about 3 inches tall in as many seconds. 

I fear I may be about to go through this several times over, but I'm hoping not. There's always a chance right? Maybe I'm just way out of my comfort zone here, I haven't been in a situation with a lot of unknown heterosexual women in a long time. And now I sound like a hermit. Joy.

So considering all of this I am, as usual, wondering am I alone in this? I probably am aren't I? And, please let me know if you have any advice for me on how to deal with a situation like that? I feel that I'm failing somewhat!


Have a wonderful day everyone,

Lea
x

25 comments:

  1. Good luck getting home! And I hate 'cliquey' women too, there's no need really is there? xx

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    1. I always try my best not to be.. I just wish women would give each-other a break sometimes! x

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  2. well, first of all, I know how you feel regarding snow situation. Few weeks ago I was in the same situation. I litteraly couldn't go home since niether buses niether taxi would drive in my direction. fuck yeah -.-

    Regarding women issue. Well, I don't believe you that you don't care what others think. Everybody cares about it. I believe you meant you won't be sitting at home and crying 'cause someone doesen't like you. At least I don't do that. But I care how people see me. Regarding no eye contact when you meet somebody new, I tend to imagine how I slap that bitch for bad behaving. :)

    http://littlemisstwiggy.blogspot.com/

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    1. I'm afraid that it is true that I don't care what others think of me. If I cared, trust me I would be an emotional wreck. After being bullied for so long, trust me it's gone completely the other way.
      Haha, I'll keep your tactic in mind! x

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  3. I hate driving in the snow I will try to avoid it at all costs!!! Love the picture at the bottom haha!

    I feel very uncomfortable when anyone is in a 'pack' If I am the only one going in to it i get really anxious and try to avoid it So you are definately not alone in thinking this!!
    xxxxx

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    1. I thought you'd enjoy it haha.
      Oh come off it, you're the loveliest person in the world! YOu have no issues lol, everyone loves you!! xxxxxxx

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  4. They might not be doing it to be horrible. Personally, I'm not very good at eye contact and if I'm in a group of people and there's someone new I tend to go a bit quiet. Not to be mean but just because I can go a bit shy sometimes. Eye contact is a confidence thing and those of us that lack that find it hard to keep eye contact up!
    So not all of us are like that because we're being horrible! It's because we feel insecure in ourselves.

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    1. I don't think they're doing it to be horrible, I think they do it because they think they're above me. And this particular individual is anything but shy. I'll keep what you've said in mind though hun, thanks! :) x

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  5. I have the exact same problem and actually I've been having such a hard time lately because of girls. I find it hard to get along with a lot of girls, simply because I feel like I have different values than them, so I talk a lot with guys. And even removing myself from them (girls - which is the majority of my classmates) have been a problem, because now they talk behind my back, make fun of me, spread rumors and call me a loner.
    Frankly, I'd rather sit alone than engaging in some of their conversations as they often make me feel so negative afterwards.

    My advice is to just hang out with guys that you get along with and often other girls/women who are just like you, hang out with them as well and are just as cool and down to earth as you!

    xoxo

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    1. Do you know what, I think I agree. Sod them, if it's not working out I don't HAVE to deal with it do I?! xx

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  6. You are definitely not alone. I used to work with a group of women in one of my old jobs and if I tried to talk to them they would just shut me down and ignore me or look at me like I was stupid. I hang around with mainly boys in the job im in now because a lot of girls don't even take the time to get to know me, they just stare at me and if I smile at them walking past I just get a cold look back and no response. Most girls/women I come across are lovely but the ones that aren't really annoy me! I like that about the blogging world too, everyone is lovely :) xxx

    http://xosarah-loves.blogspot.co.uk/

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    1. It really is a minority. I just don't understand why certain groups of women have a tendency to do that. It's just plain bloody mean!! x

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  7. haha, I sure do know women like that and have met many during my life so far. the thing is that you must stay true to yourself and be strong, then they can't hurt/annoy you because they can sense that you're over it and doesn't give a damn. stupid people who want to make others feel bad search for the weak ones who let them do that. in my eyes it's as simple as that.

    Maiken,
    Maikeni blogi - part of me

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    1. This is brilliant advice, so straight to the point. I'm definitely taking this on board and using it! <3 x

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  8. Great post! please check out my blog and if you like it, please follow me on Google Friend Connect and BLOGLOVIN, I promise to follow you back! xx
www.love-joice.com

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  9. I think there is no reason for you to feel like failing, because in my opinion there is an unwritten law of life about beautiful women and how they are seen by other women, the main problem i think is that you are such a smart&beautiful woman and I'm not saying that they are not, but thats the way some women react to other beautiful woman, don't shut down just talk to them pleasantly, jut be in a way indifferent but at the same time try to stay charming :) Hope you understand what I'm trying to say, sorry for some mistakes! like your blog so much and I'm your new follower!

    http://fashionablestreets.blogspot.com/

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    1. No this completely makes sense, it's the approach I've been attempting to go for hehe, I hope it's paying off!! x

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  10. Hope you get home safe Hun! Be careful! Totally get what u mean I find it incredibly hard getting on with certain kinds of women yet generally I get on with men very well, not in flirty way a genuine way strange hey but your not the only one :-)xoxoxo

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    1. Aww thanks lovely, I got back safe and sound :)
      I'm so glad to hear I'm not the only one! xx

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  11. That picture is so funny ^^
    Love, Paula
    www.ifiwarg.blogspot.com

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    1. Haha yes I enjoyed it too!!! x

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  12. The funny thing about what you have to say about women is that, in my experience, almost all women feel that way. We're such a strange, strange sex aren't we?

    Of course, like the others who've commented, I've often felt that way, myself. If only we, as women, would collectively get together and resolve to be kind to one another, what a change in the world that could make!

    Wonderful, refreshingly honest post.

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    1. I agree, I just wish we could all pull it together and get along a bit better once in a while! Thanks hun <3 x

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  13. I totally agree with Iuliana FS...some women will just completely stonewall attractive, bubbly or very confident women for no apparent reason. There is one woman in particular that I always get weird vibes from. I went to a party at her house, which was the first time I ever "met" her and she was not welcoming at all, she probably only said a few words to me the whole night, then last weekend she came to a party at my uncle's house and barely looked my way. I am really shy, but I'm still friendly and I always make eye contact and smile at people when I see them, so I just don't get it. I can't imagine a whole group of women trying not to acknowledge my presence...why can't we all just get along!

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  14. It's jealousy, pure and simple pet. As you get older it lessens, those bitchy girls grow into dissatisfied women who still have their own agenda's but they can't be so obvious about it in a public setting-if they snub you-even slightly-others will notice, believe me.

    I work with lots of succesful, strong, beautiful & talented women and get along just fine with them, generally it's the women who don't have confidence or passions of their own who are the mean one's. One of my best younger friends here is incredibly naturally pretty and gets no amount of pain from girls her own age about it.

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